• It’s Hard to Live with Someone Who Lacks Empathy

    • Rhoda Mills Sommer
    • September 16, 2019
    • 0

    Empathy is defined as the “intellectual identification with or vicarious experiencing of the feelings, thoughts, or attitudes of another” (dic.com). Empathy is an important part of the process in bonding. When two people can imagine how the other person feels it leads to support and connectedness. Often it is men… Continue Reading

  • Couples Never Fighting=Not a Good Thing

    • Rhoda Mills Sommer
    • September 15, 2019
    • 1

    “I’m not ready to make nice, I’m not ready to back down.” The Dixie Chicks If you never fight, then nobody’s home. Trouble in relationships is always about the extremes. It’s just as problematic as fighting all the time because both lack respect for two people. Often couples arrive in my… Continue Reading

  • Married Man Here is My Goodbye Letter (to My Married Lover)

    • Rhoda Mills Sommer
    • September 12, 2019
    • 0

    Married Man with a mistress; he has all the benefits of lying while she pays the price of delaying her opportunities to find someone who loves her first & foremost. Affairs with a married man cost so much and it’s easy to pretend & keep the fantasy burning bright. Who… Continue Reading

  • Relationships Require Vulnerability

    • Rhoda Mills Sommer
    • September 10, 2019
    • 0

    Share the Love & Spread the Word PLEASE Tweet or SHARE on Facebook (sooooo helpful)Subscribe on iTunes: HERE or Sticher: (HERE for androids)   & please leave a review. THANKS!!!!! After almost 40 years of working to help couples, I offer a podcast of substance on what relationships require to last for the long… Continue Reading

  • Accepting Imperfections is What Makes Relationships Work

    • Rhoda Mills Sommer
    • September 10, 2019
    • 0

    This you tube video ia all about love. Authentic love is all about embracing the imperfections of someone else. So many of my younger clients seem to be on a path of requiring perfection in a partner. Nobody gets all the pieces of the pie. Too many of us strive… Continue Reading

  • Guilt is Too Often Exaggerated Which Causes Stress

    • Rhoda Mills Sommer
    • September 10, 2019
    • 0

    Guilt is often exaggerated which creates suffering. Our ability to twist & turn a normal situation into a dramatic episode leading to self torture is amazing. I listen to people make wild, inventive leaps about what they should have done. This level of self torture really needs to be interrupted with a… Continue Reading

  • Making Distinctions About Guilt; Instead of Suffering From It

    • Rhoda Mills Sommer
    • September 10, 2019
    • 0

    Guilt is a complicated business because there are two sides to it. Of course, there is a good aspect to guilt. Guilt is supposed to be a pinch to remind us to do the right thing even if we don’t feel like it. Guilt is like the penalty fee on an… Continue Reading

  • Denial, Ptsd & the Narrow Road to the Deep North

    • Rhoda Mills Sommer
    • September 10, 2019
    • 0

    This is an extraordinary novel that makes you truly embrace the dark side of our humanity & provides a profound understanding of how easy & necessary it can be to use denial to survive. These are small miracles of accomplishmentby the author Richard Flanagan. It is no wonder he won… Continue Reading

  • Perfectionism, Fear, Control, Doubt & Anxiety

    • Rhoda Mills Sommer
    • September 10, 2019
    • 0

    There are many ways to trick yourself into believing you are managing your worries & fears. There are many ways to hide out in perfectionism:Everything will be ok if I do my best to look good & try hard to get everything right. I must avoid being uncomfortable & make… Continue Reading

  • Mistakes & Forgiveness

    • Rhoda Mills Sommer
    • September 10, 2019
    • 0

    I was lucky enough to work with women in prison and jail. I learned a lot about how hard it can be to maneuver a place for yourself in the world after making disastrous mistakes. Mistakes about a man’s character, mistakes in judgement, mistakes in making impulsive decisions, mistakes born from… Continue Reading