• Self-Esteem & Self Image Struggles & Self Hatred

    • Rhoda Mills Sommer
    • April 22, 2013
    • 0

    [youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=litXW91UauE&w=560&h=315] Too often self-esteem means we see ourselves in a harsh critical light. This video captures exactly how deeply we twist reality and fail to see ourselves accurately. The video made me cry because I see this struggle with self-image & disgust on a daily basis. Our culture, our… Continue Reading

  • What is Self Esteem? What is Confidence?

    • Rhoda Mills Sommer
    • February 27, 2013
    • 0

    What is confidence? What is self esteem? They are both about learning how to believe in yourself, accepting your dark side and giving up trying to make everyone else happy but yourself. You have to risk exploring your own wants, learn to live with your own humanity and risk mistakes… Continue Reading

  • Shame, Self-Hatred & Self Destructiveness; Obstacles to Change

    • Rhoda Mills Sommer
    • August 27, 2012
    • 0

    Shame, self-hatred & self destruction are often all intertwined. These three make the road to change an obstacle course. This is a triangle of defeat & can stop growth in its tracks. It's a trap that absorbs all of someones energy and it's hard to crawl out of..... The real… Continue Reading

  • Self-doubt & Insecurities Rob You & Relationships

    • Rhoda Mills Sommer
    • August 24, 2011
    • 0

    It is easier to hide out in the familiarity of self-doubt than to face the hard work of building self-esteem. Self doubt is like an old familiar friend that we want others to take care of. Looking for reassurance outside of ourselves & avoiding staking a claim on our own… Continue Reading

  • Feeling Invisible? Consider your part in it.

    • Rhoda Mills Sommer
    • July 7, 2011
    • 0

    Many people swallow too much of who they really are. They stop themselves from disagreeing with others, they smile & nod instead. Women & men bury themselves in too many hours at work or in being an expert caretaker of others and then ignore defining themselves. So many parents lack… Continue Reading

  • Building Anchors Within & the film The Man From Nowhere

    • Rhoda Mills Sommer
    • June 30, 2011
    • 0

    Koreans make the best films about revenge. There is no doubt about it. Revenge is a very primitive emotion that all of us experience; whether it's the high school teacher who didn't think you'd amount to much or an old lover who dumped you. Korean director Chan-wook Park made a… Continue Reading

  • What Can be Done About Low Self-Esteem?

    • Rhoda Mills Sommer
    • September 18, 2010
    • 0

    Low self-esteem is definitely connected to a lack of practice in making choices. "Go along to get along" has to be a choice, unique to a situation, instead of a life style. If it becomes a life style, you will lose track of who you are. Many people arrive in therapyidea… Continue Reading

  • Making Yourself More Solid Makes Relationships Work

    • Rhoda Mills Sommer
    • February 5, 2010
    • 0

    The more you know who you are and what's important, the more likely your relationship will survive. Knowing what anchors you is important to figure out. When you don't know what matters you may end up expecting your partner to meet those needs for you. Relationships that only cater to… Continue Reading

  • 13 Suggestions to Improve Your Relationship with Yourself

    • Rhoda Mills Sommer
    • May 19, 2009
    • 0

    #1. Weigh in on your regrets and mistakes. Ask yourself what you have learned. Are you carrying any residual guilt or unfinished business? Do you need to make amends to anyone? Have you forgiven yourself and accepted your own humanity as a part of growing up? #2. Imagine yourself dead… Continue Reading

  • First, Accept Yourself

    • Rhoda Mills Sommer
    • February 23, 2009
    • 0

    One of the best parts of life is sharing the ride over decades with somebody else. It is also true that finding someone worthwhile is a difficult task. The old adage learn to love yourself first is true. Loving yourself/self esteem is not built upon positive thoughts or heaps of… Continue Reading