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Manipulation of others is a great way to stay invulnerable. Manipulation is a way to hide who we really are from others. We are all a mixture of good and bad. Yet when was the last time you shared a story of being bad with someone else? When was the… Continue Reading
You might wonder what Picasso, Ben Roethlisberger and Mel Gibson have in common? They are all men who ended up with power, fame and a reputation for abuse in relationships. Narcissism means other people are merely the audience. This is not about a diagnosis of narcissism, it is about the… Continue Reading
The previous post briefly described the emotional toll the game of Victim, Rescuer and Persecutor costs any relationship. I offer my triangle of mental health: First and foremost, a fearless honesty requires a willingness to look within and take responsibility for your mistakes and problems. Instead of blaming the other… Continue Reading
In the 1970's, Transactional Analysis created an emotional game that was labeled The Karpman Drama Triangle which is still relevant today. It looks like this: The game is profound because it is a way to manipulate over a lifetime and deceive many people. Drama, intensity and power are very seductive… Continue Reading
Obsessiveness erases the other person. It can't be love if you are so swamped in your own beliefs that you really have no idea that the other person feels differently. Obsessiveness means someone tells you they don't want to see you anymore and you surprise them the next day with… Continue Reading
It's so easy to fall into the trap of believing that feelings contain the secrets of your life. The truth is feelings are often exaggerated, deceitful, deceptive, defensive,indulgent, tricky, self-promoting and above all, manipulative. Feelings can drag you around like a Neanderthal man. Feelings are not the end-all or be-all.… Continue Reading
A NY Times book review (4/19/09) of Columbine by Dave Cullen caught my attention because I'd always wondered what was the truth of this tragedy. The reviewer, Jennifer Senior describes the author as not only dispelling the myths but making "the reader care about getting it right." Cullen makes excellent… Continue Reading
