Videos to help you learn more about improving relationships & how to back fear up so it stops strangling your life. You can decide to make your life even better than it is by watching these videos.

THIS FIRST VIDEO IS ABOUT ANXIETY & THE SECOND IS ABOUT RELATIONSHIPS (& then there are 4 more bits of video wisdom)

This video explains the answer to the question “What is anxiety?” The video offers two techniques to try to manage your fears. The best thing about anxiety is that you can decide to manage it, instead of it managing you. Fears need to be backed up to make the world a bigger place.

Anxiety is a fear of uncertainty. Anxiety is being determined to create certainty which feeds a need for control. Uncertainty makes people feel out of control. Uncertainty is scary & must be made bearable, both of these things are true at the same time. There is a lot to learn in order to live with the reality of uncertainty.

Don’t let Fears, Worry & Anxiety control you & shrink your world. Anxiety interrupts possibilities and your ability to grow. Embrace uncertainty & it will allow you to take risks.

“Fortune favors the bold” is an expression that has been repeated since medieval times. If you take risks and are willing to make mistakes then you create more opportunities. Find your courage to take risks & make your world bigger & you will never regret it. Eleanor Roosevelt said “Do one thing that scares you every day.”

Script for Anxiety Video: Anxiety means you let Fear be in charge. Fear makes your decisions. Fear erases possibilities. Fear makes your world too small. Fear stifles your voice. ******************************************* Anxiety means you Love Certainty, You Love Control, You Love the Familiar & You really want to be Comfortable. ***************************************************************** The Problem is You can only GROW if you are willing to be Uncomfortable. New Beginnings are most often Uncomfortable! So You have to Face Your Fears to Make Your World Bigger. ********************************************************************** Don’t let Fear strangle Your Choices. Fears are Exaggerated & they manipulate you to Avoid, Deflect & Hide from Hard things. Don’t let Fear make you a Puppet. THINK through your feelings of Fear & Whack them back to the right size. Ask yourself what’s real? ************************************************************************ Anxiety is about feeling Bad about the Past or Dreading the Future. What’s Missing? The Present. The quickest way to get into the here & now is to Use Your 5 senses. Focus on what you smell, sounds that you hear, surfaces you can touch, colors you see & taste the air (or a carrot) ******************************************************************** Learn to Soothe Yourself, It’s part of growing up. Find Calm by breathing in & out through your nose. Then Focus on the Temperature Difference: It’s cool going in & warm going out. ************************************************************************ FEAR FULL FEELINGS LOVE TO STOMP AROUND & SCARE YOU! Fear loves to fill you up with doubts. Decide to Face Your Fears & Let them GO….. Try meditation; your brain will love it. Don’t let exaggerated fears spoil your life. ************************************************************ “Do one thing every day that scares you.” Eleanor Roosevelt EMBRACE UNCERTAINTY, it’s a huge part of life!

WATCH THIS SECOND VIDEO TO IMPROVE YOUR RELATIONSHIPS

Relationships are complicated. Learn tips to have success as a couple. Underneath communication problems are power struggles. Think about how to be a team. Try the more complicated business of how to understand someone even when you disagree.

Unspoken resentments are only one way to disconnect and create giant holes in the infrastructure of relationships. Resentments are impossible to avoid if one partner is always catering to the other. It’s all too easy to blame someone else instead of recognizing the part you play in contributing to the problems.

There are so many ways to disconnect & not enough information on how to repair relationships. Repair efforts really matter and they are most often neglected. This video offers advice on how to improve connections in your relationships.

Listen for more relationship advice on my podcast: What Healthy Couples Know That You Don’t visit the page: https://www.therapyideas.net/podcast/

Here is the script for the video: Relationships are one of the best parts of life & one of the hardest parts to get right.

Healthy relationships are created when two people know how to be individuals and also know how to be together. 

Real love means being committed to being the Best Person you can be.

Relationships require a lot of work so Don’t Be Lazy!

What makes them them so hard? Respecting the differences is difficult to do over the years.

At first we fall in love with the differences. Then in years 6 – 10, we tire of them because all the illusions are gone. This crisis can be an opportunity to build a more authentic relationship.

Respect is more important than love because you don’t have to like the differences,

You do have to make room for them.

You must make the time for 5 to 50 conversations, because that is the only way to soften the differences. 

Learn how to have more understanding for each other even when you don’t agree.

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Connections are so easily interrupted & broken because there are so many things that create distance.

1. Resentments that silently stockpile over time create huge problems.

2. Your partner does not try to understand your disappointments 

3. Expectations are Huge and that partner has the false belief that “Love means they 

should know & I don’t have to ask.” Asking for what you want matters.

4. Neither partner makes enough time for amends, repairs or taking responsibility.

5. Ugly patterns of criticalness, blame & disdain become ordinary.

6. Values Collisions (one person is too frugal, the other spends too easily)

7. Constant Power Struggles instead of learning to be a TEAM

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How to Improve your relationships?

1. Turn towards each other & share your vulnerabilities.

2. Be willing to Problem Solve instead of Blame.

3. Do things You Don’t want to do for the other person. Sacrifice.

4. Reach out & make amends, pursue repair. Being stuck in anger does not bring anyone closer.

5. Don’t keep secrets or tell lies because they destroy trust. Risk being more authentic.

6. Do the hard work of facing the pain your partner may express instead of running away from it.

7. Recognize BOTH of you contribute to the problems

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If You want to fix Communication:

Find your Courage to talk about Hard things. 

Don’t be afraid to ask:

Why is sex missing?  Do we need a budget? When was the last time we had fun?

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Remember there are 3 parts to every relationship.

YOU   &   ME   & THE US

Figure Out How To Take Care of the US.

FOUR SHORT 30 SECOND RELATIONSHIP VIDEOS:

1.  Learn About the 3rd Part of All Relationships

2.  Improve Your Fighting

3.  Vulnerability Matters

4.   Resentments Hurt Relationships