Enjoying the Reality Offered in Bridesmaids, the Movie

Bridesmaids, bad relationships, bad relationship, relationships badOne of my favorite parts of this delightful movie is that Annie, the maid of honor is struggling with life after having to let go of her dream of owning her own bakery. In America we seem to believe that everyone can just follow their bliss. We too often ignore the reality that dreams fail and get interrupted. How do you handle life after the dream dies? This is not a question asked often enough in our culture.

There is another question asked in the opening scene. Annie is in bed with the obnoxious, occasional boyfriend played by Jon Hamm. Why do wonderful women hang onto relationships, where only the tiniest crumbs are offered? This is a question I ask myself & my clients practically every working week of my life. Hopefully women can see this movie & recognize themselves.

The absence of Annie’s father in her life may have contributed to her delusions about Jon Hamm being good enough because he’s not home or available anymore than her father. This is true for lots of women in real life.

It’s painful to watch Annie put up with Hamm’s extreme selfishness more than once. Though this happens in real life on a constant basis. Women make too many excuses for men who are rude because they don’t really respect themselves. Somehow they pretend what’s not ok is ok over & over & over again. Annie even has to park her car outside of his gate. Without a doubt, denial is the most powerful force in the universe.

One of the best parts of being a woman is the possibility of friendships. Men just don’t have the same opportunities for depth. The movie is hilarious in its take on friendship & jealousy. The “topping each other’s toast scene” between Helen & Annie makes your ribs ache from laughter. Jealousy really offers big clues to what you want. They both want to be her best friend & Annie can’t emotionally afford to figure out how to share.

I also loved Meghan’s “stop pitying yourself” speech to Annie. Since Meghan is obese she knows a lot about how hard life can be. There really is something important about fighting for your life. So many people give up, coast or take the easy way out. Meghan knows the struggle is worth it, she knows that down to her bones.

The movie is funny, poignant and a really good time. Go, laugh & cry!

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