• Imagination Fueled by Fear & the novel: The Submission

    • Rhoda Mills Sommer
    • June 11, 2012
    • 0

    Living life well requires using your imagination. This is sad because so many people suffer from a poverty of imagination. It is deeply sad that fear has such a profound impact on imagination. Often I ask people who their heroes or heroines are and they look at me blankly. I… Continue Reading

  • Triggers for Trouble (Especially Boredom)

    • Rhoda Mills Sommer
    • June 2, 2012
    • 0

    Any addictions counselor worth their salt, will ask a client trying to maintain their recovery to compile a list of triggers for their possible relapse. For example, weddings can be a huge trigger for people in the beginning of recovery.....all that free booze floating around is a terrible temptation or… Continue Reading

  • Mindfulness Helps You Rein in Your Emotions

    • Rhoda Mills Sommer
    • April 30, 2012
    • 0

    "Mindfulness is the miracle by which we can call back our dispersed mind & restore it to wholeness so that we can live each minute of life." Thich Nhat Hanh in The Miracle of Mindfulness I've just taken my third online course on the brain & it's very clear that… Continue Reading

  • Consider Your Regrets of 2011 as We Begin 2012

    • Rhoda Mills Sommer
    • January 1, 2012
    • 0

    "...regret clings to me like a sweat I cannot shift." Alec in The Spanish Game by Charles Cumming Being authentic means accepting regrets are an important part of life. I believe the regrets that are hardest to bear are lost opportunities. The unfinished business of the things you failed to… Continue Reading

  • Shame & the novel Lost Memory of Skin

    • Rhoda Mills Sommer
    • October 1, 2011
    • 0

    In 1980 I worked for a victim focused rape crisis center. I started the incest program for them when the only resources I could find were two books that had been written. Later, I had the opportunity to train in Philadelphia to obtain some knowledge of perpetrators. Perpetrators of sexual… Continue Reading

  • The Movie Warrior & Forgiveness

    • Rhoda Mills Sommer
    • September 18, 2011
    • 0

    Many people grow up in families where ugliness is ordinary. Being betrayed by a Mother or Father is a big deal because that's where kids first learn about trust. Alcohol can contribute to a lot of ugliness, as it does for the father in this story. Forgiveness is not an… Continue Reading

  • Bettye LaVette & Bearing Disappointment

    • Rhoda Mills Sommer
    • June 12, 2011
    • 0

    "Forty years I kept singing...before the money came." from her song The Battle of Bettye LaVette I take every opportunity to see Bettye LaVette sing. She puts every fiber of her being into all her songs, which makes her a soul singer down to her bones. The first time I… Continue Reading

  • Being a Witness to Someone Else’s Pain is Vital

    • Rhoda Mills Sommer
    • May 7, 2011
    • 0

    In the great, raw, howling moments of pain; having a witness matters. There have been many times where the only thing I can do is be a witness to profound pain. I don't dismiss this as unimportant or as merely catharsis. When someone allows you to witness the depth of… Continue Reading

  • The Triangle Straight to Hell

    • Rhoda Mills Sommer
    • January 18, 2011
    • 0

    Three emotions that drive people to profound misery are fear, obligation and guilt. All three of these are easy to exaggerate. These three work in combination to suffocate the life out of ordinary people, like  a python with a good grip. A healthy approach to guilt is to consider what… Continue Reading

  • The Pursuit of Happiness

    • Rhoda Mills Sommer
    • October 26, 2010
    • 0

    We are the only country in the world established with the right to pursue happiness as a constitutional tenet. That may be part of why Americans are so determined to find happiness. I think it’s why we chomp through our natural resources at a higher rate than everyone else.  Pushed… Continue Reading

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